When you are a mediocre runner, are speed workouts even worth it? Seriously? It's not like I am ever going to get that much faster. I am trying to weigh the desire to PR against the dislike of pain, torture and chronic disappointment.
My tempo run was filled with all kinds of excitement today:
-New playlist that made it way more enjoyable
-Failure to complete run as intended (there was a ten minute water break at my car 2 1/2 miles into the tempo portion--and I then convinced myself to run the final 1 1/2 miles of the tempo portion).
-Peed in my shorts (nothing new)
-Completely made out with a water fountain. And not just any water fountain--one at the boulevard, which means there is a 79% chance I WILL get some kind of an STD from it. But man. It was WORTH it.
I started thinking that I want to figure out a goal for the B2B. A real one. A PR is not looking realistic. Not being negative. Being realistic. Which is important to not set oneself up for failure. Last year's B2B weather was impeccable for a race. And while lounging near the start line an hour or so before the gun went off, the announcer actually told the runners that they should be setting a PR that day--no pressure. But he was right.
For whatever reason, I am not in the same place as I was last year. I actually think I started running earlier in the spring this year. Trained for a 5K--and have logged more miles. But I am not as strong as last year. The only difference I can think of is that last winter I did P90x--and that may have carried over into the spring/summer.
I was thinking about my 3 previous B2Bs and how each one had its own goal. And I am proud of something different for each one.
2007: I remember when the B2B first started in 1997--I wanted in. Year after year I would follow the race coverage. Scan results. And think "I want to do this some day". While I always "ran" to some extent. I probably rarely ran over 3-4 miles. So when I committed to the race its 10th anniversary year, I wasn't sure I could even FINISH.
I trained on my own. Didn't have a network of running friends to compare notes with...my training consisted of 5-6 miles a day on the treadmill, 4-5 days a week...random 8 mile runs...Horrible Adidas sneakers...Horrendous knee and shin pain (from the sneakers I would later learn)...and a lot of self-doubt.
But race day came. And I ran. My initial goal was to do it in under an hour. I ran it in 55:50/9mm. It wasn't until hours and hours after the race that I felt proud (initially I was disappointed...even though I completely exceeded my goal). PLUS since it was the 10th anniversary, all finishers received a medal. Medals make every run better.
2009: 8 months after having a baby I ran again. I stopped running at 5 mos preggers and didn't start again until April. So not a ton of training. And still exclusively nursing. And up 2-3 times a night to nurse. My initial goal was to PR. But as the race came closer, my new goal was to do it in under an hour. That year the weather was horrible. Extremely humid and hot. It was gross. The upside was having my BFF with me. We finished in 58 something or other. Erin got snagged to the medic tent. And I beelined it for the shuttle line with 78979789 people waiting in the blazing sun to get back home ASAP to my baby that needed to nurse. I vowed to never, ever run that GD race again. Or any race again. But the next day I texted Erin "I think we should do the ME Half".
2010: Was able to train better with a baby that slept through the night and was no longer nursing. Erin refused to run due to her tent experience. Actually wouldn't even set foot in Maine the race weekend. And if you think I am kidding, well you don't know Erin then. I trained hard. And as I said, the weather was perfect. Pretty sure everyone I know PR'd that day. I ran 8:33s, under my training goal but missing my secret goal of 8:30s. But I gave it my all. Greta was watching with my parents. It was a good day.
And now....well. Now? It is easy to say "stop over thinking it". Not as easy to follow that though. Nothing in life is smooth sailing. Always bumps along the way. I am at a big bump with my running. But I am sticking with it. A lesson will absolutely emerge on the other side. I can't wait to see what it is.
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